Pictures of Kara

Kara
Originally uploaded by norfolkdawg.

Kara-pigtails
Originally uploaded by norfolkdawg.

Here are a couple of pictures of Kara; including one with her pigtails.

Like Father - Like Son

Ethan&Dad
Originally uploaded by norfolkdawg.

"HomeJames"
Originally uploaded by norfolkdawg.

I'm told that Ethan looks like me and I suppose it's true. He also acts like me from time to time. Not sure if either one of those are good things :-)

Like Dew Your Youth - Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - “I’ll Dress the Way I Want!”
“Adolescence is the time when we become ourselves…Adolescents are involved, nearly full-time, in discovering who they are” (11). Peterson rightly notes that this causes anxiety in parents. This process inserts itself into areas where before we are able to severely curtail the exercise of free will in our children. Decisions we once made for are children quickly become the decisions they make and want to make. Peterson goes on to say that identity is the product of decision. We can all agree when he says for teens that this is not a smooth process. But consider this: “Youths often practice defining themselves by demonstrating what they are not: they are not, for instance, what their parents say they are. They provide evidence in hair and clothing styles that differ from what parents choose…But if parents let this kind of conflict dominate the relationship, youths will conclude that the parents are not concerned with the deeper developments stirring beneath the surface, but only with what others are going to say or think” (13). We would call that producing Pharisees. I don’t think that parents of children of any age are immune from being too concerned about these outward matters. In a store, I overreacted to Ethan’s bad behavior (and he was disobeying) because I was more concerned about what a fellow shopper thought of me as a parent, then I cared about my son’s obedience at that moment. I’ll come back to this chapter and Peterson’s discussion of 1 Samuel 3 as it relates to adolescence.

Speech Therapy for Ethan

On Monday Ethan's speech therapist came for the first time. At 27 months, Ethan is developmentally delayed in his speech. That said, he is where he should be for all of the other development areas. Based on what the speech therapist said, it seems mostly to be a muscle problem in his mouth. Basically, he needs more exercise. So, there are some things that we can do and are doing to help in that way. The speech therapist will also come once a week. Since his evaluation a couple of weeks ago, we have already seen some improvement in his speech. Especially in his willingness to use certain words. He is using mommy, daddy, please, baby, kitty, and no (especially) more regularly, although they are not as clear as they should be. There is not and never has been a concern about his intelligience or understanding. So, we're just along for the ride and realize that at some point we might jokingly long for the days when he didn't talk as much.

Youth Retreat - Modgnik

Modgnik is a Virginia-wide PCA churches youth retreat held at a Young Life camp called Rockbridge near Goshen, VA. I believe this is the third or fourth year that Calvary has participated in this retreat. I was unable to go last year due to Kara's birth a week or so earlier, but everyone who went had a great time and is excited to go this year. Some details are listed below:

Who: Modgnik is open to any Jr. and Sr. High School students
Date: Friday, April 15th - Sunday, April 17th
We will leave from the church Friday afternoon and return Sunday afternoon (times to be determined.
Cost: $90 - this covers food and lodging for the weekend. Everyone also gets a T-shirt. Scholarships through the youth budget are available if necessary. We will also eat at least one meal on the road.
Registration: I need to know who is going as soon as possible. The reason for this is due to a limited number of slots available to us this year. We have room for 13 youth and two leaders. Registration forms (let me know if your child needs one) and monies (payable to Calvary) will be due later.
What To Bring: Clothes, toiletries, bathing suit, towel, bible, notebook, and pen. Money for on-site snack bar, although I hear the food is excellent. Linens or sleeping bag also might be needed.

Please contact me at the church office with any questions regarding this retreat.

Another quotation from Peterson

“A parents main job is not to be a parent, but to be a person. The parent’s main task is to be vulnerable in a living demonstration that adulthood is full, alive, and Christian.”

Like Dew Your Youth - Chapter 1

Chapter 1 - The Gift of Adolescence (Like Dew Your Youth, by Eugene Peterson)
Many people fear adolescents, whether they be their own or someone else’s. When I tell people that I work with teens, some people let on to their own fears, while others appreciate that work, if only from a distance. Indeed there are many challenges that teens and pre-teens face these days and parents are dragged through that same mud whether they want to or not. That said, the first thing that Eugene Peterson asserts in Like Dew Your Youth is that adolescence is a gift from God to those in middle age. He says that, “in these middle decades of life we are prone to stagnation and depression, the wonders of life reduce to banalities and the juices of life dry up. Failures and disappointments accumulate” (3). Adolescence is a means of grace for such as these, indeed for us all. Adolescence reminds us that they even though we may be done growing biologically and professionally we have been certified, there is still growth that is required in our lives. “Growth is the delight of the child and the agony of youth, but it is not natural to the middle-aged” (7). The growth of our teens challenges us to grow, although we can refuse that challenge even while we still help our children to grow – Peterson calls this “detached” parenting. Peterson does not try to define exactly how it should look or will look from home to home. Suffice it to say that there are no rules or patterns to achieving success. Each parent, child, and family is different. He says that, “particular rules, techniques of discipline, variations in strictness and permissiveness – they run the gamut. One thing stands out: these parents, seriously, honestly, joyfully follow the way of Christ themselves. They don’t define adolesence as a problem and try to solve it. They are engaged in vigorous Christian growth on their own and permit their children to look over their shoulders while they do it” (9). So, there are various ways that we may view teens and the intrusion of their growing presents in our families, but how do we view them? How do we view those challenges? Peterson would have us to see adolecence as a gift and an opportunity to grow. What are your thoughts?

Ethan-double exposure

Ethan-dblexposure
Originally uploaded by norfolkdawg.

One more picture of Ethan (2 really). This is one of those instances where something went awry with the camera, but we ended up with a fun picture of Ethan as a result.

EthanCrying

EthanCrying
Originally uploaded by norfolkdawg.

This is one of my mother-in-laws favorite photos of Ethan. Nobody can remember why he is crying, but let's just say that Lydia captured him at a bad time, so to speak. That said, it isn't unusual to see this face a couple times a week when Ethan throws a temper-tantrum.

Like Dew Your Youth

Like Dew Your Youth (subtitle: Growing Up with Your Teenager) is a book by Eugene Peterson that I am going to be reading and posting some thoughts based on the 12 chapters in the book. My goal is to do at read and post on at least one chapter a week. This will help with some of the content on this blog and hopefully give us all something to think about. Teenagers present unique challenges to parents, but there are wonderful opportunities for parents and teens to deepen their relationships, rather than deepening rifts. That said, I hope that there will be some helpful thoughts for parents of children of any age, not just teenagers.
For the record, Eugene Peterson is one of my favorite authors, particularly his books on pastoral theology. He may be most well known for his contemporary translation of the Bible called The Message. First post on Like Dew Your Youth is coming soon.

Ethan, blinds, and the cat

One of the hardest things to do as a parent is to not laugh when your child is doing or has done something that they shouldn't do. Case in point - On Monday we had an unseasonably warm day in Norfolk (around 70), so we opened a couple of the windows in the house. As a result of pulling up the vinyl blinds, the cord was hanging down to the floor. However, these cords can be hazard for young children as they can get wrapped up in the cord, so we don't let the kids play with them. As we were all in the dining room, Ethan grabbed the cord for the blinds and began to pull on it...not wanting him to do that, we told him to let go. He obeyed and let go of the chord...the problem was that this released the blinds sending them crashing down. This would not have been a problem had our cat not been sitting on the window sill enjoying the open window. Whimsey got bonked on the head with blinds and Lydia and I were left trying to contain our laughter at the cat's misfortune and Ethan's having messed with the blinds at all. We were only mildly successful.

Crib Climbing

Ethan (26months) decided that Lydia was not fast enough in retrieving his pacifier, which he only gets at bedtime anymore. Never mind the fact that he threw it out of the crib in the first place. So, taking matters into his own hands, he decided to get it himself. However, his attempt at climbing out of his crib was wholly unsuccessful...he landed on his head. He is fine...I just wonder if he will try again after this attempt. Time and bumps in the night will tell.

Extended Warranties & Children

After trying in vain to repair our digital camera, I am rethinking declining the extended warranties stores try to sell you when buying such equipment. We have always declined in the past, seeing them as largely a profit for the stores and little benefit to ourselves. That said, Ethan got a hold of the camera and dropped it on the tile floor. This is the second time he has dropped the camera...maybe we should be more careful ;-). And that leaves us wishing we had a warranty or something. Do those warranties cover acts of toddlers? Anyway, the camera is stuck permanently on view mode. We might have repaired or for a little more $ we might buy a new one. We'll see.

It Starts Early...

Today's funny moment came courtesy of Ethan. I was marveling at him trying to ride and steer his little tricycle (that only has one handlebar; the other one broke off) while also holding a toy cell phone up to his ear. It seemed a little dangerous, but then again I might be a little dangerous talking on my cell phone and driving too. Do you think they make a hands free attachment for his cell phone?